In the stressful ups and downs of life, it’s good to love and accept yourself, no matter what.
It’s easier to love and accept yourself when things are going well. When you are under stress, though, it can be challenging to offer self-love and compassion. Sometimes, people will move to a place of shame and blame when life veers off into a land of darkness. If you find yourself in a rough patch, though, the best medicine is to double the dose of loving and accepting yourself. This will promote healing and, perhaps, stave off stress-induced illness or injury.
My favorite analogy of why immersing yourself in love and acceptance during a stressful period is based on a simple math.
Let’s say we all start at zero 0. If you have a positive event, you add one and what do you get? You get 1.
0 + 1 = 1
Now, let’s say you are back where you started, at zero and you have a stressful event. You subtract one and what do you get? -1.
0–1 = -1
What we want, though, is to be in the positive. So, if you are at -1 and you add one positive experience, what do you get? That’s right! You get zero or NOTHING!
-1 + 1 = 0
So, when you have an impactful life event, to get back into the feeling-good- about-life zone, then it’s important to double the dose of these positive experiences and to change negative self talk into positive.
-1 + 2 = 1
Your life stress scale
Is there a way you can tell how much stress you’re under? Back in the 60s, two psychiatrists conducted research to determine if certain stressful life events led to increased illness. Their research led to the Holmes and Rahe (the names of the 2 psychiatrists) Stress scale, or the Social Readjustment Rating Scale, which gives a score to specific life events. If someone scores 300 or more on the scale, then s/he is at increased risk for illness. A score of 150 to 299 reduces the risk of illness by 30 percent. And a score of less than 150 is a low risk for illness.
Pursuing pleasurable activities is important to mitigate stressful events. However, the most important function a person can engage in while recovering from a major life change is to convey love and compassion towards self. This is accomplished by offering positive affirmations to yourself. Now, you can get complicated in designing affirmations, especially if you are affirming for obtaining goals. Yet, the best affirmations are the ones that are simple. Saying clearly to yourself the phrase “I love and accept myself,” can have a healing effect on your mental wellness. Most often, this specific affirmation is used in conjunction with the tapping Emotional Freedom Technique, yet it’s not necessary to learn the sequence to benefit from the affirmation.
How often should you use this phrase? Well, when you are under a lot of stress, you would benefit the most by saying it as often as you can and then double that.
“I Love and Accept Myself.”
Copyright, 2019 Brenda Henning
